I found out he doesn't have a facebook, twitter, or myspace. So, I'm going to actually go to his house to spy on him.
she called my cock the "semen sword" and then we invented a position called excalibur
that's why i date skinny girls, they don't realize how small it is.
Did you see the soccer ref give that girl the red card as she was being kicked out of the party?
we turned dreidel into a drinking game. i kept landing on gimel. im glad we have 7 more nights of this
do you think having her use a clorox disinfecting wipe on her vagina will keep me from getting her herpes if I don't have a condom?
There are taser marks on me. Your face flashed before my eyes when i woke up and saw them.
If this outfit doesn't get me pregnant tonight I don't know what will...
I bet my lungs hate me more than my liver
That's a hard toss up
We fucked so hard that when I orgasmed I tore his towel rack off the wall. He was more impressed than mad.
He said that I started crying after sex because he was leaving to go back to Europe after the semester was over and I wouldn't see his dick anymore. This is why I need to stop hooking up with the exchange students.
they saw the dick pic he sent and started calling him 'subway'
I wonder whether Megan will forgive me if i have phone sex in her attic
Girl. There is no more toilet paper. You should have seen the twerking I just did to shake the pee off.
I'm with the cops, Trish's gay husband stabbed himself and is framing her for attempt of murder and I'm dressed 4 the club I'm wearing leather pants leather jacket leather boots and black club top. Embarrassed
Randomize
