Haha she couldn't find her dress in the morning. So she left it. How do the hell do I discreetly return that to her at work. More importantly, how did she discreetly do the walk of shame??
Now there are nude photos of that bangin hot Russian spy chick...this is officially the best scandal ever.
She offered to massage my back by hitting it with a sparkly purple double dildo... Bi chicks can get creepy
quit making up holidays to get me to go drinking with you
Just got a blowjob on the pier where my great-grandfather entered America.
I put the extra pregnancy test in my sex toys box as a reminder that my actions have consequences.
Yeah I'm a responsible adult man but I legally unbind myself from anything that occurred that evening and am in no way responsible for those actions.
I pretty much envision me eating a turkey leg whilst fucking you. I have priorities.
Bring enough bail money and little extra for tacos after
This essay is so getting done. I am spurred on by thoughts of test-driving your newly shaven face by sitting on it as soon as humanly possible.
crossing my fingers that hitting golf balls off my pourch was a dream and not something that actaculy happened
I should be a dude... Walking a goat on a rope is a total chick magnet.
So what's the moral standing on reading gay porn on your phone whilst sitting next to your 87 year old Grandma?
Please come over here so I can show off my beard, talk to you about how quantum computing is actually a symptom of interstellar physics, and then put my head under your dress
Profesor just winked at me. This class might be easier than I thought
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