I think it's just because she's got "I'll sleep with anyone with a decent car" written all over her face.
i think i gave myself a perma-hangover. or god just hates me.
they just did a mariachi cover of free bird
fyi, if youre wondering if offering a female police officer sexual favors will get you out of a ticket, the answer is no.
Girls behind me in the library are trying to outslut each other with stories from last semester. I'm about to set my cock on the table between them and label it "tie breaker"
They upped the price of Plan B! Rite-aid is going to be the reason I have illegitimate kids.
I'm sorry about your car but on a brighter note I did wake up in my dorm. That's something right?
Fuck you.
It would be one hovered percent delicioui
All I know is that either you or I told a black guy that he looked like usher and he was sexy and that is our confession
Just got flashed by an entire bus of girls in school uniforms. We then had to wait beside each other at a light. It was awkward.
After a few mimosas, my mom started sharing her plans to move out of the house and into a retirement village so she can be the youngest one there and find herself a "nice old sugar daddy." Needless to say, break has not started off well...
I'll screw just about anything, but I draw the line there
Well, I'm most mad that he lied to you (about being married)...but the CAT THING IS A CLOSE SECOND
He lasted less than 30 sec. in bed and then sent me a friend request on LinkedIn. Wtf.
Who is naked dude in the kitchen?
Randomize
