your butthole totally puckers for the ginge
Jason just peed on the potty all by himself!!
"omg awesome!, you do realize we aren't together anymore"
This ain't no lie cnn says sonny n cher's dtr chastity is going to have sex reassignment surgery to become a man named chaz
Not surprised. I always thought Cher was a very passable post op transexual.
I walked into my house this morning to find an 18 pack on the counter. I think that's gods way of ringing the bell for round two.
Martha Stewart would most definitely roll a great joint.
His second form of ID was an emergency room wristband from an hour ago. What the fuck is going on right now
Haha yeah he had an allergic reaction to the alcohol earlier. He thinks that if he only drinks vodka he will be ok...
We shared that special kind of eye contact that can only be experienced when you know one party is saying "Oh god, I fucked him in the back seat when you were in the front, didn't I."
just because you are in college doesnt mean its okay to pregame easter mass.
Dude, at this rate we're going to get arrested a second time tonight.
Walk of Shame today included voting.
I legit just said "vaginal access denied" then told him his password hint was "tequila shots"
i'm gonna fuck his crew, i'm gonna wax my asshole. i'm gonna make them all cry tears of sex joy then move to colorado.
I need my comforter. Pls bring it to me and drape me in it like an animal pelt. Ps I'm naked.
I wasn’t trying to be creepy it just happened
I’m beginning to think that’s your defining personality trait.
I do very much feel like vomiting. and I have no idea where that lighter came from. thank you for coming to my TED Talk.
Randomize
