i have your red jacket for some reason. and a good deal of shame and embarasment. note to self, wear underwear when you wear a dress. also, i was electrocuted last night. dont ask how.
After she swallowed she let out a hurge burp. No BS. I'm the cock of the walk.
I think you have the wrong number. But at any rate, respect.
i am doomed to only fuck guys with curved cocks
Just grabbed my laptop and a beer to take a shit. Mom gave me a look of disgust. I miss college.
Some kid just walked into class with his schedlue written on a keystone box.
I need a leash, or some shame. Maybe.
All I can see in the pic you sent is white shorts...
Thas my pasnts in colleg! Tehy glow! AND SMELL LIKE BEER!
So i just got guilted into doing a tequila shot by a group of guys chanting "USA!" at me.
He pointed at some girls and said "I'm gonna have sex with them girls over there", and disappeared.
Do you think he feels stupid trying to bang girls with his small penis? I'd be embarrassed.
There's holes in the drywall and the beer pong table is a broken door on two barstools. You know they like to party.
I blew past the Governor's motorcade going twice the speed limit and DIDN'T get a ticket. God wants me to get laid.
What are best friends for?
Picking your clothes up from a one night stand you had nearly 2 months ago
Is it okay that we fucked on my car hood, in his driveway, at 4 am with cars passing by ?
Also we're getting drunk and sledding down Caroline street. See you soon.
Randomize
