yeah...it smells like an asshole would smell if someone ate sewage.
I just love slightly exposed cleavage. Not too much to be whory but just enough to say "your kids will never go hungry"
i just used my scantron for my final to make paper shotglasses. i'd say i passed in flying colors.
I'm wearing this super skanky ass dress that's wayyy to slutty for church but I think Jesus will appreciate it because i look so bangin for his bday.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
They thought "watering it down" meant adding more vodka
Get to the bar. Power hour leading up to the rapture.
Sorry I forced you to take an adderall at 1am and then proceeded to dance to Lose Yourself outside of Qdoba.
Just got home and found him passed out with his ass stuck in a Rubbermaid garbage can. He must have been like that for a few hours
Casually had to file a missing persons report last night
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just got your message from Saturday. Shove all the kittens down your pants? Really?
I was emotionally compromised.
My booty call just moved 2 min from my house
This has pregnancy written all over it
I can't figure out how to eat twizzlers and I have to be at a wedding reception in an hour.
Please never have kids.
I'm committing myself to dance. Also, I'm unsure if you said space party sounded lame because dude was old, but I hope you're over it because I love space, and I love David Bowie and I love to dance, and you need to embrace this with me.
i could only love him more if he was covered in glitter.
Just woke up next to a hungry lesbian and a half eaten croissant on my stomach. Can you come get me?
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