No, seriously, 1.5 gallons of sangria plus two days of untapped cock. Waiting here. For you.
as we were driving back from the frat house he pulled down his pants and convinced me his penis "wanted some air"
when i came out to my mom, it was over brunch. i was eating a banana. not exactly my smartest breakfast choice.
She went home with him because he works at Jimmy John's and his car "smelled like meat"
Finished watching the entire first season of mighty morphing power rangers. Now I have nothing. Not even a life.
High with mom again. She's giving me relationship advice.
He wheeled me around walmart in a cart, and stole at least 30 dollars of junior mints fpr me. Best date ever.
I am trying to take a picture of a man in a wheelchair trying to ship a michael jackson portrait
He's easy on the eyes, light on his feet, and rough in bed...what more could a girl ask for in a rebound?
like stop just cause your whole life has been one enormous reject pile does not mean that i have to suffer too
he apologises profusely for spelling mistakes in his texts but doesn't care about cheating on me. priorities
sent a snap of my boobs out to my FWB his response was what happened to your other nipple ring.. how do I say it got ripped out by my other FWB last week without sounding like a slut
I've had more orgasms than showers this week.
I'm soaking her vibrators in tabasco and wasabi paste. "furious" is an understatement
I threw up in 4 different Starbucks across the city before 9 am.
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