Dude someone changed all the contacts in my phone to I Like Eggs
You asked the officer if he could bring you to the same jail as T.I.
answer the phone. i thought i was eating cheese but it was butter. i ate a lot of it.
Everytime I see a couple on campus walking and holding hands I just want to yell he's gonna lie!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Chalk up having sex in a car wash.
We looked at pictures of a Texas banjo contest from 2006 for a half hour and then were surprised by who won. That stoned.
Maybe. This hangover is made of nightmares and that thing from the Alien movies.
I hate that we are older than the real world people now
She looks well worn, presumably from a cavalcade of penis.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Soooooo I may or may not have accidentally been a catalyst in a destroyed marriage.
I'm driving to his house to eat chicken and hopefully have an orgasm
And speaking of good acting I may have a sex tape now
He and I tag each other in memes all day. You could say it's getting pretty serious.
you know you need to get laid when: getting wrestled to the ground in a self-defense class turns you on....p.s. this is a booty call
I could see the visible disappointment when she saw my penis
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