Its only 8 and she is already passed out
Perfect here is wht u do. Gently slip your index middle and ring finger into her butt hole but gently u dont wnt to wake her..let me know when ur ready for step 2
Rub youre cunt and tell me you love me.
Your incorrect use of you're doesn't arouse me in the slightest.
I dont think problem is the right word. Problems arent something you enjoy. Life would be too boring without gambling.
just ask for directions from a guy with a penis drawn on his window
PS: the photo I uploaded for this internship site is the same one i used for my fake ID. I like to keep it classy.
Church boner. Awkwardddd
Well unless he sent his sperm via fedex, this baby isnt his
I just got turned down by a drunk fat chick. At my own birthday party. God hates me.
YOU LET ME GO HOME WITH CREEPY RON JEREMY?!?
...and?
I hate when you're right.
I was stopped at a light on my way home and a priest threw holy water on my car. Seems fitting after last night.
A million fucking miles away, and the sun still manages to fuck my hungover mornings up.
IT'S A GIANT FUCKING ROBOT, DUDE. LOGIC IS OUT OF THE QUESTION BECAUSE AWESOME.
You can only use the "she handcuffed me naked to your bed, i couldn't do anything, sorry bro" excuse once.
You have a tempurpedic. you only have you to blame.
So, 'head before the store' turned into a fuck fest, & that's how I ended up at the grocery store smelling like a cum farm on Black Friday. How's your weekend?
I don't know, all I remember is waking up at 4 in the morning to him going down on me.
Randomize
