I wanted to google "huge banana" but I'm pretty sure all I'd get is dick pictures.
I woke up on a raft in a bath tub filled with beer. excellent night.
we all know badassery is carried on the XX chromosome
I hope this doesn't change things. I feel that me being a minor made it more exciting.
Just saw all the pictures from the party. I'm wearing a different shirt in every single one.
Drunk. The frashmen love me. Give them. Toilrt paper. And shiots
your love of good penises attached to ugly faces is disgusting and slightly disturbing.
It's okay though. My mom didn't believe that they were mine cuz they were magnums. Having a surprisingly large penis ftw
I yelled out look at all those hickeys. And then gave her boyfriend a high five
WHAT THE FUCK JASON, WHY IS THERE A FREE BLOW JOBS BY LISA SIGN IN MY FRONT LAWN WITH MY PHONE NUMBER ON IT?! PEOPLE ARE PULLING INTO MY DRIVEWAY!
Also, I saved your name as Everclear last night. No idea why I did that.
Hey, I'm renting a storage locker for the summer to keep all my bondage shit in so my parents don't see it. You wanna split on it for your all your weed shit?
I'm just sayin. If your gonna cheat go for someone TOTALLY different. Fucking her twin would be a waste.
There's no good way to say, "sorry your son saw me naked on top of your brother"
You know its a good night when ur woken up by the bartender asking you how he ended up at your house
Randomize
