Yeah, it wasn't as bad as I thought. I tried not to clench and things went pretty smoothly.
in the car goin home for fam dinner and he is silent... i think he realized how big of a whore his little sister is
My T9 Word has dryhumped saved but I can't even get it to figure out bbq.
Good cause the way I see it, we are down to DAYS left of college so we should have as much naked fun as possible. And Jenga really facilitates that.
she's laying in my bed with an ice pack on her vagina. how do you think it went?
His pick up line was "your one sexy pumpkin, I'd love to carve." Why would you let me go home with him?
So my mom and I were talking about what I should get you for christmas. She made it clear I cannot get christmas lingerie.
We were kinda loud so his roommate woke up and to make up for it he invited him to a threesome. I can't drink whiskey anymore.
As I was puking, these 2 guys started peeing next to me chanting me on
He kept kissing me on the cheek when I was pretending to sleep while he cried
I just put on lipstick to sext him. That should tell you where my love life is at.
It's not as funny as it sounds. I shit myself at the company Christmas party.
holy shit the yoga instructor bought his baby pig to class today
I think I broke my toilet with my head. There are ceramic pieces everywhere. and I might still be drunk.
I text the word "masturbation" so much, all it only takes my iPhone to auto-spell it is for me to type "mas".
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