i realized i had a pad on before i went to this guys house so i stuck it in his neighbors shrub.
just bailed mom out of jail. Tell me i'm not the favorite child
Just made nachos out of string cheese and sunchips and laying in my bed watching babay einstion..get on my level
Be still, my beating vagina.
Ok fine. Wild. Free. Like a stallion set free in a beautiful meadow filled with flowers and sexy lady horses
I don't remember its real name, I just call it the Harrison Ford Cush after that idea with the Indiana Jones mask. I should just get high and sell people my ideas for their Halloween costumes all the time. I'd make a fucking fortune.
I no longer see him as a simple set of male genitalia attached to a very sexy body. The title "trophy fuck" seems wrong. Damn.
I told him I had AIDS after he bit me. His dad cried. I think I just ruined the little guy's 3rd birthday, but he had in coming.
Now that I'm born again, I'm preserving my gift.
Your vagina isn't a White Elephant gift. You can't re-wrap it after it's already been given several times. That's white trash thinking.
I mean you were pretty drunk at one point you asked if we could have a glass of water ready for you in case you choked while bobbing for apples, but you said grape juice was preferable. You can't choke on an apple btw
He just showed me how to break a chop stick with his ass.
FUUUCK. sunburned vagina. this is the worst day ever. i'm not leaving my room until it peels.
I get so sad when I watch him slowly destroy his life with whiskey and cocaine. Then he bites my neck and I just want to fuck him. I can't help it.
There were a lot of gay moments in between the Strippers and coke
She sent a group text pic called "Assemble" of his dick next to her forearm.
I'm down.
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