if the best thing you can say about him is "he probably wont kill me" you may want to rethink hanging out with him
While you were in the ER we decided to tailgate in the parking lot until security told us that's not allowed.
Oh eartly, In cocy youtu youchv make the wallflowers d tskunks!y, couch protection now,.sryou should feel special !
Dude your not gonna get by security covered in blood wearing only a robe
Don't worry I'm drunk they won't say anything
I swear to Christ if it turns out to be an intervention, i will set you on fire.
He may only be 25% black, but after that sexual experience I am 100% never going back.
If you're wearing dry underwear your day is already better than mine.
The party got hot, we all started raging, took off some clothes, someone threw me in the shower and we all kept raging. Nude Rager, I was there at the point of conception.
There something about a girl that pirates lemonade off a restaurant fountain as a mixer that I find intriguing.
No I just rolled on the floor giggling. I think that's the equivalent to a post sex victory dance.
A homeless guy wouldnt accept my granola bar because he didnt have any teeth. I think i win the prize for the ultimate rejection
maybe if I avoid him long enough we could skip the talking part of "we need to talk"
ok but bondage is pretty much my easy mode
I have 2 phone numbers written on my vagina. I told you I shouldnt be left to my own devices after tequila shots.
you had me at "meet me in the bathroom"
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