When I saw him standing at full height, I realized exactly how much his body structure reminds me of his penis.
I had sex with him, and then he gave me a $5 Starbucks gift card. Totally worth it
I just answered "If only I knew" for a quiz in criminology, she loved it. I got an A
He just kept muttering to himself "stabby stabby stabby stabby" while we were boning. I will never be boning him again.
They don't exactly give out small business loans to start-up dealers
The following message is brought to you by IMSOFUCKINGSORRY. Dude I'm really sorry I got you arrested last night. You are allowed to choose a repayment plan from the following options: Money, weed, or a single kick to the balls any time within the next calender months. Repayment outside of the aforementioned options can be negotiated and considered within reason.
I drank all the drinks. And jump off roof. Yay
My going away gift was all of them dancing around with solo cups on their dick and balls...these are my friends
So apparently they remodeled our middle school. Looks like we'll need to find a new roof to play beer pong on this summer.
Your dick is going to fall off. Be careful or you'll get callouses. A workingman's dick.
There is what appears to be urine on the woman's bathroom sink. I just have so many questions right now.
well considering the guy who just delivered my cookies had to console me as i had a mental breakdown in front of him i'd say i'm 4/10 right now, thank you
I feel like my cat and I are playing mind games. I need more friends.
This conversation went from me banging other women's husbands to learning about baked goods. If that isn't personal growth I don't know what is.
It's officially "let him eat me out in a sundress with no panties" season. Needless to say the first date was a success.
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