How am I suppose to look him in the face when I know a commercial lasts longer than he does?
She wanted to test if her costume allows her to still have sex in it. It does
Kelly Kapowski is pregnant and it's not Zach Morris'. I no longer believe in true love.
You took shots of captn out of a empty percocet bottle, i just saw you fall threw the floor of rock bottom.
I feel like I had a lobotomy last night. I blacked out. Did we try to stick my Penis in a beer bottle?
He passed out. Woke up long enough to declare himself "the sauce boss" and then bit me in the face.
Penises. Penises everywhereeeeeeeee. Penis ratio is sooo disproportionate. I can't NOT get laid tonight.
We had sex under a tree in his boss's backyard, then I hooked up with his best friend. I don't even care how I got home.
Chilling. The soap was talking at one point if I rememeber right...
not totally sure where im at but i think i've definitely woken up on this couch before. bong on the coffee table looks familiar. should be able to find my way home
ARE YOU THINKING VAGINA THEMED RESTAURANT
All he did was like my Instagram picture and I'm already planning how to turn down sex with him this weekend...
Tequila is gods way of telling you don't fuck with tequila
I hope Trump leaves Planned Parenthood alone for at least another month. The week got away from me. #whorelando
Julius Caesar had a huge penis
WTF are you reading?
Ha ha! No, the guy in the Caesar costume last night. We hooked up. His dick was huge
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