i knew it was time to break up with him once he pulled out the Halo foreplay costumes
It's not fair. Guys with dicks that huge should not be allowed to be catholic.
It's official. I am the proud owner of his very own sex tape. Amateur awesome porn or awful delete-me-now porn? Come over help me decide.
Apparently last night drunk me put my phone in a cup of beer to make it "fun scented".
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I wonder if that one guy remembers you sticking salami to his forehead when he was passed out on new years eve.
Just got hit on by a middle-aged puerto-rican clown who told me that it would be bad to date someone who offers to buy me coffee and makes something of themselves. I love the NY subway.
You went home with a man in a loincloth
I just watched him leave in half a loincloth. Don't you just love Halloween???
I'm not entirely sure what happened last night, but I think I dislocated my kneecap during an epic Mario Kart battle...
That moment when you cant decide between eating spaghetti or a Popsicle for breakfast
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So I just sneezed blood everywhere. On the upside. After yesterday I feel way more confident AND I give even less of a fuck.
Holy shit, I just successfully took and sent a boob pic AT MY DESK I have conquered an entire new level of skill.
I have no concept of chastity or moderation, she is a Catholic guilt poster child, how could I not try to hit that
CODE RED CODE RED MY VIBRATOR IS BROKEN THIS IS NOT A DRILL
how much of this shit do i need to take before i think its a good idea to set the house on fire and scream satanic mantras?
We were making eye contact while i was throwing up.
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