SECOND walk of shame from the westside Hilton, SECOND foreign family w kids staring at me in my dress, glitter purse, spiky heels and booze breath. I said I was going to church. More confusion.
my mom asked me how i could steal on a clear conscious and i told her it was because when i was younger she let me watch alladin and he did it.
sometimes i wish i was able to text my cat and tell him i miss him and that i'm thinking about him
Never underestimate the healing power of vomiting and a bath.
She tried to sit inside the drawer to my dresser and when it broke, she burst into tears calling herself fat. Too high to deal with this
Had to. She was getting married in 2 days & her vag was having a close out sale. You know I love a good bargain.
Stop banging my friends. This is getting weird.
Stop being friends with hot 18 year old girls.
at the end of the day, college isnt gonna be for everyone... and some of us are just going to have to learn how to breathe underwater while sucking cock.
You asked him for a membership to him and his dick.
Do you still have "be bumpin" written on your ass in glitter pen? Who brings a glitter pen to a bar? Or pulls there ass out for that matter...
You're right. I woke up today with my ugly sweater still on and no pants. I'd say it was a successful night.
I just woke up on the living room floor at my parents house. The last thing I remember was making a scene at Buffalo Wild Wings because our waitress "Sent the game into overtime" with a 0-0 score
I'm wearing a sports bra. Of course I'm not getting laid tonight.
How hot? Like... how many hemsworths?
It was a good thing I was on the balcony flashing those guys or I would have never seen her skipping to his car
Randomize
