next time dont tell jokes :) miss bonerkill
have you facebook stalked him yet?
No, I don’t know his last name...
Just google his license plate numb
That's why Kanye is a gay fish.
It's refreshing to see you in something that is stained with something other than vomit and spilled alcohol.
Dude i thought about you literally the second after I came. This friendship is starting to cross some serious boundaries
Be still, my beating vagina.
Just bought a breathalyzer and Sharpies, guess who thought of a new drinking game
I just stood next to my childhood self. Fuck, I'm really stoned...
No worries. On my way home to get ski poles and wipe the sick off my face. Then it's time to get drunk in the park
Also, no joke, I think that raccoon hair is still in my eye from last night.
After a little too much, I decided public urination was a constitutional right.. Nearly got deported for that one
Do they mail horrible human being awards or do I have to pick it up or what's the protocol on that shit
Most drunken moment of the night is me pouring Chanel no. 5 all over your boobs and rubbing it in...
Although can we find me a starter dick? I don't want security showing up again. That was awkward.
I found out he hated a girl that I hate so I fucked him. My reasons for fucking guys are getting bad.
Randomize
