TBS has betrayed me by telling me tyler perry is funny
Just found out I slapped a vegan in the face with meat last night.
whoever set the energy saving light timer in the lobby bathroom cleraly has no concept how long a work dump takes
honestly I asked the same thing when we had our slip n slide and margarita party
New York to be Host to America’s Biggest Singles Event
Before I left he asked me if I could submit my panties for the frat house undergarment chandelier. I said yes
Buying Plan B right after a lecture on feminism. It's nice to know who I can thank for that right.
Dude, the chicks a procotolgy intern. Don't cheat on her. She knows where it hurts the most.
Man, I wish they all looked like that. Your vagina deserves to have a nice frame around it, and God's signature at the bottom.
You were so drunk last night you thought you force pushed the automatic door open.
Kylie Jenner Wasn’t in the Kardashian X-Mas Cards & the Internet is Losing it
I'm auditing financial statements and ur growing weed this is bullshit how did this happen to me
well after pounding on the ceiling for 5 mins i just went up there to tell them to shut up.. 2 hours later i'm naked, high, lying on their kitchen floor. it escalated so quickly
He is dating a girl who is on the Olympic shooting team...I've never been so scared to hit on a guy with a girlfriend in my entire life.
I barely trust you with my tinder, why would I let you take the staples out of my head?!
I peed outside 4 times after the bar, safe to say I had great night
He's gone. He left a note but all it says is "Dear Neil" followed by a drawing of a hand flipping the bird in the direction of a butt.