i just woke up in a strange room and the first thing i saw was a chewbacca mask... wtf
Make me a promise>>> if you ever see the brats from that tv show NYC Prep walking around, you will trip them, and you wil throw drinks on them
i just want his dick, seriously i'm about to take trifiling lessons. we'll call my alter-ego blair and she will screw his brains out, girlfriend or not.
Ok so the guy below me is either having sex very loudly or is very lonely
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At a Jewish lesbian wedding. I stick out like a sore, uncircumcised penis.
I just found out I lost my virginity the same day my parents did, 25 years later. This is my life.
walking back to the dorm.. she is flashing evryone, demanding beads. we tried to stop her and now she just keeps yelling "Bourbon st bitchesss"... you get her tomorrow
You're either a hooker or Beyonce. Beyonce is abnormally good at doing everything in heels
There is no sno cone on earth better than alone naked time. Side note: text when you all are headed home.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She's chasing her own tail and is afraid of her own feet. My stoner cat, ladies and gentlemen.
I just got dropped off by that cop that pulled you over. Best sex ever! Consider that $140 ticket my birthday present.
the only reason I'm still sleeping with him is to get the university's secure wifi password
I offer naked tickle fights and orgasms and you call it trouble. I call that Christmas.
ugh, my whole family is going ape shit over my sister's pregnancy blog. I dont get it? Anyone can get knocked up! I had rebound sex with a new york ranger last night, now that is something to fucking blog about.
Came up to an intersection and someone was blasting My Chemical Romance at like 9 AM. They're DEFINITELY having a good day
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