Doing final review now. Then epic shit. Then going to take it. Should start it be 1030. Done by 2. Drunk by 3. Hammered by 4. Blacked out by 5. Streaking by 6. Jail sometime after that
Things overheard in WeHo: "Just drink a corona and eat some ass, you won't be hungry anymore"
I'm sorry, but you without makeup is like christmas without presents.
I just wnated to let you know that I laminated my history notes so i can study in the shower.
he took his pants off right in front of me then just stood there so i went for his boxers and he said he was waiting till marriage
the general consensus of people in the room is that i should have another bottle of wine.
"people in the room" being me.
It's 4PM and I'm finally awake.. I'm covered in dog fur and shame. I'd say it counts as a good night.
Then you started asking people on the drunk bus if they knew the word "gumption". if they didn't you told them they weren't taking advantage of their high education opportunities and you were disappointed in them.
You ever got drunk on $5? Cuz it's about to happen
I totally intended to come to the hotel, but I woke up in a parking lot
The struggle is real.
I'd probably lick every tooth in Carly Rae Jepson's fucking mouth.
Teen Choice Awards are on if your wondering.
I woke up and found piles of popcorn in a trail around my house, ending at a laundry basket full of pillows. What were we trying to catch last night?
Just passed the animal clinic parking lot I had to pull over to puke in during welcome week. I can almost hear the dogs barking at my shame again.
I woke up only wearing a Breaking Bad "Los Pollos Hermanos" apron he got from Loot Crate next to a 3 empty bottles of Zima,Jolly Ranchers, and a jar of coconut oil. Fernet is one hell of a party starter
i just found a pair of your underwear stuffed behind my harry potter books...was that on purpose?
haha no, it was majik
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