Buhtt sex?
Just saw 2 very young girls abandon baby buggys in the Xwalk to fight. Gotta love Holyoke.
I think she would actually eat a penis if anyone was brave enough to let one near her mouth
Rode a jet ski for the first time three days after I lost my virginity. Hell of a week for my vagina.
All of my current injuries can be related back to sex.
He couldn't say anything coherently but shot off a perfectly timed "that's what she said" when michelle said he'd have to ride in the trunk because she didn't have enough room up front.
We did a shot for each one. Father... son... and holy ghost. That wasn't enough though so we moved on to toasting dead relatives.
I'm about one sudden movement away from being able to cross "throw up in a fortune 100 company's bathroom" off my bucket list.
Hey please buy toilet paper today. Plastic grocery bags are starting to hurt now
I am just saying if Clark Kent walks into your life, you fuck him
Had a dream I cut my own dick off. That's it I gotta see a doctor...
Umm
Exactly.
I had to get my boss birth control a work today. I knew going to ASU would come in handy in my career someday.
I had cheese pancakes which is pretty much just melting cheese in a frying pan and then eating it except youre in denial that your life is a wreck
Did I see you at the bar last night?
Yes. You just kept grabbing my boobs and saying how much better they are than yours...
Seriously, I really just burned my nipple making ravioli.. I'd explain, but no reasoning makes this acceptable:/
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