Yeah no shit. My mom is giving me winecoolers as we watch a show abt alcoholics
I would say a second date is not looking likely, I acciedentally bit his penis. it's still bleeding 43 minutes later.
I have hooked up with someone in EVERYONE OF MY CLASSES.
That's how you know you deserve to be a senior
I don't think child baring hips is a compliment.
Im so tired of dysfunctional exs fucking up my relationships with future dysfunctional exs
I am the slutty bisexual glue that holds this friendship group together.
Though my hair looks fantastic i will unfortunately have to turn down your 4am sex offer
The bathroom smells like ribs. What did you do?
She has dubbed herself the Pied Piper of Penis and keeps yelling about getting Cocktober started... Will send pix soon
Homophobes nationwide are huddled in their bunkers tonight and I can't stop giggling. Could be the wine.
I need two food groups: booze and turkey sandwiches
omg so there's this guy on the roof and he just stripped for no reason and now i think he's making out on the rooftop with some other guy? who are these people
I'm only fucking women born in the 90s this summer
They have beer where we have blood.
I'm pretty sure even the managers want me to show up hungover my last day, it would be negligent and disrespectful to do otherwise
Randomize
