I am drinking with my family and the average drinking tolerance is a shot and a half. I feel like the incredible hulk.
You love popeyes more than me
does delicious chicken come out of your vagina?
I have big tits. Rules don't apply to me.
you said you get the best orgasms off Pez dispensers. how do you think he felt????
Spotted: woman loading franzia into a toddler-sized shopping cart for her child to push. Beautiful.
They fucked on my pong table last St. Patty's and broke it. I feel like I should be hiding my new one. Would hate for a tradition to form.
Yea there's blood all over the porch but we wont have to buy alcohol for the rest of the week
Like her Facebook page isn't even hers. It belongs to her tits. It's Titsbook
probably one of the worst weekends ever... i got peed on by his sleepwalking roommate.
I woke up to my roommate checking my pulse
I was proudly and successfully the first girl ever to get kicked out of a the bar for being too drunk last night. Loving spring break.
You hit a new plane of existence as we all watched in awe
Dude he took a shit in the lake and it just floated around and lingered near our boat for 2 hours. I fucking hate that kid
I'm on a walk of shame carrying YOUR pants. You owe me.
Just a heads up that Dad just brought home a new Porsche and the sales girl he bought it from.
Umm okay. What are they doing?
They’re in the hot tub
Can I get divorced when I grow up?
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