3:47a: I take it you're not on your way over
so we were pounding it out and someone knocked on the wall and was shouting at us
that didnt stop you
nope
I was so high last night that i'm 89% sure my roommates set up an obstacle course for me and timed it. Not positive.. I think one of the challenges was pairing shoes
Pretty sure I went to the bar in my bathing suit, sweat pants, and high heels.
No, the sea-green pills were klonopin, the bright blue ones are adderall. you're probably going to have to adjust your plans for the day.
How do the people at CVS not know your living in their bathroom?
Hangovers were designed by God when he decided that so far he had taken it WAY TOO EASY on me.
my mom said i couldn't bring cigarettes cause it was a family trip, which was really irresponsible of her because now i have to walk around the beach drunk trying to find someone with cigarettes.
we got hammered off table wine and i ended up biting my acrylic nail off so i could finger his butt.. ill never look at valentines day the same
His apology was sex and a subway sandwich. Strangely, I'm okay with that.
Some lady old enough to be our mom took us home, made me eggs and he still got some. Where do I claim my best wingman/sister trophy?
IM DRINK YORE HIFH WE ARE POSTERCHOLD OF AMERICA
During your work shift I was either: a) stoned. b) high. c)stoned. or d) high.
Get off me. I'm done. I want a cookie.
I threw up in a pringles can. how do you think my night went.
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