Well you will be happy to know that aaron carter hit on me
yes because when i jack off the first person i think about is christina applegate
Watching this movie and saying "drink every time you see an animal" was a bad idea...circle of life...holy crap
It'll be just me and my penis against the world.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He filled our room with little plastic cups of beer so the only way I could get out was by drinking them all.
We literally played a game called pass the child which consisted of us shitfaced tossing the 5 year old birthday boy at each other
At some point last night Lemondrops turned into me doing shots of vodka and eating sugar packets at the bar.
Before I roll over explain to me why you're naked and on my floor.
I found your wallet in my underwear drawer......... Don't worry I don't plan on asking any questions
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
OMGGG I JUST SAW A REAL OWL JUST CHILLING ON TOP OF A SIGN POST. I WALKED UP TO HIM AND SAID HOO HOOOOO AND HE TURNED HIS HEAD AT ME AND WAS LIKE YEAHHH BRO
No one should ever have to Neosporin their nipples. At least he apologized.
I was wondering how I got the burn marks on my boobs and then I remembered....
The baked potato bra?
he brings me coffee and gets a blow job. not sure if I trained him or he trained me or it's simply mutually beneficial beautiful.
I dare you to find another dealer that delivers bud to your home along with deep fried vegan burritos
I'd say "I think I gave my TA chlamydia" is an accurate way to sum up my life.
Randomize