Regardless thnx for trying to help out, I realize we are dealing w/ very stupid girls here
im going to pretend im pregnant so i can eat a lot then i will accidentally fall down the stairs
Blowjobs in the shower are a lot like blowjobs not in the shower. Awesome.
I'm not holding out much hope. She met me in a nighclub when I was arguing with the cigarette machine
Not sure. All I know is that she has a tight dark green skirt and I will not rest until I have used my teeth to rip it off of her
Pretty sure I just shit out pure stomach acid. I'll explain after you take me to a hospital
The last thing I remember was paying off her younger brother not to judge me, then puking on his shoes.
My mom just walked in and she was like "Who ate all of the cheese?" and all I could think of was you trying to become a human taco
He was my shower sex Sherpa last night. And we both made it safely up the mountain.
This is a mass text. I will facerape you if you bring me Fierce Melon Gatorade and 4 D batteries.
Why is your ex naked in my apartment?
But for real though. That weed tastes like the jolly laughter of Santa Claus.
At this point it's more of an experiment to see how much actual bush growth is possible. See, being single can be both educational and surprisingly comfy!
just found a picture from last night.
the one of you riding a horse with nothing but a bulletproof vest on?
uhm.... no?...
What are you feeling right now?
Idk. I just flashed a porch 🤷🏼♀️
So not in the best place to do an emotional inventory
Randomize
