can you sing with all the voices of the mountain? can you paint with al the colors of the windddd
wasted?
im pocohantasssss
all ill say about last night is that we tried to stop you. oh and the bus you're on is going to nashville.
someone was throwing condoms at us.
no, they just magically show up around you.
I'm going on a valentine's date with the random guy i hooked up with in the bar bathroom this weekend...i feel like julia roberts
they sound like some classy girls.
Hey, I don't give them daddy issues, I just take advantage of it. The real bad guy here is American parenting.
The spray paint was a bad idea, 'insert penis here' isn't coming off
I threw up in a mitten on my drive home. Wow.
Dear lord though. So much glitter. It's just a big gay explosion and all of my whore muscles hurt.
Thats alot of pressure.
Just on your vagina. BTW I'm passing your house.
I woke up wearing my panties and an eyelash, soo I'd say your birthday was a success.
I'm eating your cookies as payment for having to listen to you. Happy sex
Nothing makes the walk of shame as great as disapproval from a mom getting ready for work
death bed.
death patio
stfu you slept on the patio!?!
Also I know now I was meant to be a comedian. Had both arresting officers laughing.
My parents are coming to visit the 28th. How bad is it that I put a reminder in my phone to "hide sex toys"?
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