it's like everything I expected to see tonight all put together in one at once
that is the greatest description ever
You say "arrested with two drunk girls" like it's a bad thing....
if someoen knew that someone accidentally drunkly kissed your boyfriend would you want them to tell you/?
followup question: what if both somones were me?
I think im gonna have to stop sexting on the metra. The middle aged businessman behind me just leaned over and whispered 'dirty girl' and highfived his seatmate.
I had to call maintenance to come unclog the toilet.
Something to remember me by.
She needs to learn she only fits into our friendship as a DD.
Um I think everyone drunk and there's some douche on violin.
they call him the transporter because he'll be your designated driver in exchange for sufficient weed or sex.\n
what about money
no - he has a code he lives by
Ive seen him cuddling a giant inflatable seahorse. Nothing could be creepier than that.
SORRY! Pervert came out for a bit. BAD PERVERT! BACK IN YOUR HOME!
Shroomed with my best friend'a dad at his wife's surprise birthday party so you can say I have experience in the field
So I don't know, I'm not a doctor, but I might be juggling dates with 3 different guys...
like i got into his car and the beatles were playing. this kid is def getting his dick sucked
dude new orleans is fucking wild these two guys just performed dueling banjos except they were actually fighting with the banjos
Just used the word fistfucking in a serious conversation with my professor in front of the class, while making an appropriate and valid point. Win.
Randomize
