Kelly, is this rhetorical, or sarcastic? You are very kind & quite beautiful, but we never really evolved into anything & your prevailing ambivalence spoke more than words ever could.
"We" really do not exist-if we ever did. Both of us may have been hoping for more than was possible.
I would enjoy sitting down to talk about the dissolution, but think it may end up being counter productive.
How many times do you have to sleep with a guy before you get him to kiss you???
and i think we compared dick sizes, then high fived...
We're past the whole "Did she just try to finger my ass?" Stage. Now it's encouraged.
It made me think of you cause he just screamed "CAPTAIN PLANET" a lot and kicked people in the balls.
Apparently I was so drunk I threw my entire wallet at the stripper on stage. That was the third time I should've gotten kicked out.
my drunken justification for peeing in her closet was that her shoes were ugly
The to do list extremely baked self wrote for me last night says "1. Join gym 2. Passport? 3. Join a gym" And then just a drawing of a squid
I walked outside an you were laying down talking to a star about your life. That's when I took the bottle of jack away...
I have a hunch Mama J got around.
Am I allowed to say that about my own mom?
How would your parents feel if we installed a sex swing?
I remember us getting kicked out of the bar, but neither of us know why. We woke up next to chicken bones on a plate with spoons, and my car has mud all over it including places where feet shouldn't be, like the speakers on the car door.
Being hungover in this office is the actual worst. Like they look at me and know I was wasted at 1 am, karaokeing Billy Idol at a gay bar.
did you make it home?
i'm in a room and it looks like mine :)
hahah close nuff if it isnt
Ladies night is a gift from god. If it weren't for that, I'd probably be selling my eggs for booze money.
Randomize
