Get your hand out of your ass!
how did you know my hand was in my ass? Guess where my other hand is..?
In your belly button
I need to start cutting my cocaine with Plan B
Man now I have poo on my blackberry!!!
brownberry?
Maybe I need a light up heart over my vagina like Christina aguilera to get the point across
I'm going to fuck him so hard that his dick is going to fracture
Glad to see your being a lady about this
a search helicopter?!
Im only slightly posetive that left over guacamole and wine are unacceptable for breakfast at 6.30 am
So he was supposed to be helping me with my math but instead we ended up drinking coconut rum in his basement and having sex. I think my mom was right, getting a tutor will be good for me. Relieves the stress.
Can't tonight. I'm supposed to get drugs for some college kids. Just doin my part in helping to enlight america's future
I forgot to ask you how long you're housesitting. By which I mean how many bones can I get in averaging 2.5 bones per day.
20.
Got too starbucks. 3out of the 4 girls working i have ducked and haven't ever called. My coffee has dick written on it. It may contain spit by pumpkin lattes are only once a year
I'm in the smoking section between a transvestite molly dealer and a group of juggalos. I shouldn't be that hard to find.
Uh oh we had sex and I don't think I like him anymore help
On another note I am sitting in my bed naked, buzzed, and working on a notecard for my 8:00am test tomorrow. I think I need to make better choices.
Um. I just realized I still have a beer in my purse from last night. I'm at work. I am so classy.
Randomize
