butt sex is not good for yourself don't do it
Thanks?
a/c is broke at work...just took my panties off at my desk and the janitor saw it...might have a date for later. let you know
When he brought me into his room he showed me his James Bond calendar and matching sheets, and then told me that his goal in life is to be James Bond….epic fail. Mission Impossible. I was scared to take off his boxers to find out that they were also James Bond themed.
RUN LIKE YOUR JAMES BOND
I didn't realize how hung over I was until I rolled over and the world rolled over with me.
She's coming to town, taking me to a Suns Game, wants Anal, and knows we're not going to date, I imagine this is what heaven is like
He went down on me and then slapped my ass saying "thanks for the confidence boost"... is this all I'm good for?
do not get into a discussion with my roommate when im sitting there naked ever again.
Just got motor boated by a horse in the street
If shame burned calories, I'll be back to my birth weight by the end of this weekend.
He's such a champ. He puked on purpose just so he'd be coherent enough to roll this blunt
we broke up because he couldn't handle the fact that i've slept with more girls than he has. also, i've slept with the girl he's seeing now.
its like a catch 22, sucks that you've stopped, but its like a vagina high five
Remember that girl from my stats. class that I ran into at the bar 2 weeks ago? She literally hasn't been to class once since I told her I sit behind her.
Do you not realize that being Batman fulfills about 95% of my non-sexual fantasies?
That's true. Ask me when I'm not fucked up. Nvm hold on. Btw. Wikipedia dinosaur. It's fascinating
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