I just realized that the music from spongebob is also used in real sex HBO.
"fuck a duck" is spelled out in chinese food on my counter... im kind of nervous to search the rest of my house......
That's cool how's he been?
He got hit in the face with a beer bottle so he has two black eyes and 13 stitches.. He hasnt changed much.
Because when I say 'You shouldn't drink anymore', she hears, 'I personally challenge you to chug 3 more mixed drinks'
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turkey basters and jungle juice, is that really the whole shopping list for new year's?
you started introducing us as kentucky and gentlemen
I can always make him wear a mask... I'll tell him it's a fetish.
JOY: That feeling when you crack open a handle for the first time, and the flow limiter comes off with the cap.
He walked into the pizza shop... Pulled the fire alarm.. And proceeded to dance to it...
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I've never had someone so bad at kissing. It was like he was trying to block my airway with his tongue and he succeeded...
There is an alarming amount of food in my bra.
He's all enlightened and liberal. My next beefcake will be much more Neanderthal.
We fired a shoe out of a medieval cannon. I know not where we got either one.
I have a guy for practically everything... except for making me waffles on demand. will u be my waffle guy?
momentary stint on a second floor library computer...guy next to me snorted blue adderall off his notebook through a cut straw, i cant tell if this guy is my hero or just plain crazy...
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