dude, i think i am in a porno. I was working out at the hotel gym and some chick was doing yoga and a guy comes up and says "good, now i know your flexible" then they started making out. WTF?
Spider just rapelled from her vag rethinking online dating.
i wanna anger bang this girl behind me at work. she never shuts up with her annoying voice. but her boobs are phenom.
is it STILL halloween? when did this turn into a week long holiday
that was you who tried to jump in front of my car in the monkey suit wasnt it
Is it bad I'm drunk at orientation
You've been there for 12 hours, what are you supposed to be doing
Not be drunk
Okay, tomorrow we'll have a day of life-sorting and plasma-selling.
She bit my shoulder during foreplay last night, and it's already infected. I think she has rabies.
You can trust me. I'm unemployed and not wearing pants.
Every time we have sex, I feel his dick ramming my soul into submission. Problem is..... I LIKE THAT SHIT!
How do you politely tell someone to get out of your house in Russian
Last night when we banged she had nothing else on but socks that said 'property of Jesus' on them.
The fact he has had a girlfriend for 5 years and they are trying to work it out isn’t going to stop me from sleeping with him. He said it himself you can’t cheat on someone you love...
whered you go
woke up in a ditch, shat infront of a little league game, slept in her stairway...i need to come here more often
idk he wanted to trade sex for a triple order of hashbrowns
AND YOU SAID NO?????????
Randomize
