after the first, "yea you like that baby", i quickly remembered why i had stopped having sex with him.
Thats my favorite, when ex girlfriends become XL ex girlfriends
Bro I am trying to have one night stands nothing more, unless she is baking waffles I can eat out of her butthole I am not interested
he ran through my sliding door
in his defense that door gets complicated after 10 beers
Also I think I'm starting to get calluses on my hands from my level of sexual activity
No, no. The rest of his everything inspires me to put his dick in my mouth
Smoked before work and just remembered i left pringles in my desk last time i was high. SCORE
She was to tired for head so she opted for a footjob with poor results. I dont want to talk about it
That's one good thing about being an only child. I can masturbate wherever the fuck I want
Just watched a middle age white woman scream WHY DON'T YOU GO FUCK YOURSELF, HELEN?! Helen seemed absolutely scandalized.
We almost ended up sober because of u!!
There's a 50-50 shot that I will wake up with an ass tattoo tomorrow.
Not entirely sure how I got drunk off 2 mimosas but here I am
I've never been to an orgy, but I would assume nachos wouldn't be out of the question at one.
I just dropped a chicken nugget on the floor and seriously prayed that it would be ok....I think this job is making me crazy.
Randomize
