Sponge bath it is.
I feel like our house is getting pulled over.
I showed him my bush... on skype.
Poopin on the sidewaaalllkkk. I wish my text told you that was a song
i was about to cum until he started doing shrek impressions.
He poured the shots. We did them together. I cheersd him out of the shower
Remind me again why sleeping with a coworker and his wife would be a terrible idea.
And then I passed out in my towel and was woken up by my roommate introducing me to her trick for the night.
He brought me bullshit flowers and a bullshit apology. Even shrek did more than that for Fiona. And he's an ogre. Does this not say anything about him?
I FEEL LIKE I CAN TAKE DOWN A FULLY GROWN MOUNTAIN LION WITH ONLY A POINTY STICK OH MY GOD
Need your help. Dad's drunk and trying to build a still in the basement.
NM he's asleep in a pile of towels. They need to ease people back into Hockey Night in Canada.
why is "bang the student affairs grad assistant" the third highest thing on your semester goals list
My dry spell starts kindergarten this fall...
They grow up so fast.
Only real friends lend their restraints to engagedfriends to fool around with married strangers.
He asked if I was alright. I said "Yeah, I'm just an incapacitated ball of orgasmic bliss right now."
Randomize
