New word for getting laid so we don't sound like whores in public when we are talking about it : stamp the passport
This is how scared I get when I ride roller coasters. And how scared I was when I had to poop when I had herpes.
do you know what somber means? it's kinda the opposite of a kegstand
I took your shirt off for you after you threw up on yourself, read you the ugly duckling, and then tucked you in. you better fucking love me, jackass.
HOW DID YOU END UP IN THE BATHROOM WITH A DANCER AFTER 12 MINUTES?
Threesome in a minivan. New low
Woke up the next morning in an 8 year old's bedroom. Saw my bra swinging from the spiderman ceiling fan and decided it would be best to dip out w/o it.
Does he cat effect his dick pics to you? Because THAT is true love
Well we were going to compare notes, but all I could remember was throwing up, and all she could remember was kissing, so then we decided to not compare anything.
What would you do if your asshole suddenly made the sound of a sheep duck baa/quacking the words kill me
You are so incredibly one of a kind, it's astounding
Well, after emptying the contents of my stomach into a fucking rose bush, the only things moving through my digestive system are pills, coffee, and my own lip gloss. If that gives you any idea what kind of a day I'm having.
We're gonna be late. Scott went too far predrinking amd tried pierce his own lip with a poptab. Save me a beer, i'm gonna need it.
As you passed out you started to cry and say "Mufasa" over and over again making everyone else cry.
Watching Supernatural does more for me sexually than the physical encounters with 90% of the men in my life.
No instead we fucked in the elevator.. it was wrong on so many levels..
How tall was the building? Maybe it was only wrong on some of them
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