we're taking a shot everytime we receive a "Happy Thanksgiving!!!!!" mass text. up to 7 since 10am. God help us.
I woke up with cheeseburger in my mouth and a deep sense of accomplishment.
Life lesson today, a six foot hot guy I meet at a party CANNOT fit on my bike with me.
They set the pop up pool in the basement-running filter and all. Drunk swimming. Come now.
Its... i dont even know. theres lots of rap music and i cant find my shoes
I've got to stop giving the gift of vagina for every occasion. I'm exhausted.
nothing worse than walking out of class after 3 hours and having covered exactly zero information
walking out with herpes. that would be worse
At least I look tastefully trashed. My nipples are hidden and I'm standing up.
They just broke the window so they could get in and smoke the taxi driver out...
I'm tired of the topic. I sent him a pic of my vagina to change it.
I want to tell you your future: you're going to be having sex
I have 13 missed calls from when I slept outside on some rocks
So you're not opposed to us ever having sex again? Because it just seems like such a waste to let a penis like yours go.
Couch. On fire.
Feel free to drag me back to reality at your convenience
Randomize
