Things overheard in WeHo: "Just drink a corona and eat some ass, you won't be hungry anymore"
Do you know of any times in scooby doo when the monster turned out to be a real monster? You know not just a person?
I'm constantly one strobe light away from an E flashback
Brutally Honest is my real middle name, Princess just sounds better.
Judging by what's in the bathroom right now, I see you graced us with your presence last night.
i almost burnt down an apartment complex. little busy, get back to you later
For the record, chili cheese fritos are not a chaser.
Would you even take no as an answer? I have a feeling you see it more as a challenge.
you crashed our wine night double date and sat on the floor eating cheese talking about how big his dick is.
Bring beers. The password is "I brought beers" but you can't come in if you're a liar
Just got escorted to my 7:45 class by an old woman because I was too hungover to not realize I was four floors too high.
i came so hard i kicked through my windshield
Making drunken Mac n cheese at 3 am I understand why witches constantly stir their cauldrons. Much more homogenized temperature and slim chance of boiling over. Good job witches.
I think one of your friend's offered my friend chicken tenders back at his place...just FYI he should probably come up w/ another line
I'm trying to arrange "Flawless" to come on as soon as I get up to leave the room after my thesis defense. Bow down bitches indeed.
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