the bus pole looks like a man who feels guiltyty about something
guess who was drunk and crawling in the middle of the road and got brought home by the police last night? HINT: ME
I just saw a commercial that said "call your doctor if erections last more than 4 hours". I said "disgusting" and my mom said "I know, i hate when that happens." Get me out of here.
the #6 from wendy's when stoned is definitely better than sex. i dont care what anyone says.
21 Porn Stars Confess What Sex Is Really Like On Set
well, if it gives you any insight into how crazy it was, i am currently wikipediaing "anullment"
bet u 5 dollars u can't guess were i woke up this morning
oh god.. jail?
better, on the catwalk of the auditorium
I have fifteen cents in cash and 80 cents in the bank. BUT I have weed.
did anyone else see me puking into my coat sleeve?
My clit ring got caught in his beard. Never. Again.
19 People That Found Pubes In All The Wrong Places
You are mentally unprepared to be exposed to my degree of perversion.
be ready to rage tomorrow. like naked ranch dressing rage
There's a dead squirrel in the freezer. Is that what you stopped to get out of the road last night?
The worst decision I made last night was allowing myself to be duct taped to the ceiling
Bro if you were a bird I would puke in your mouth right now
I didn't think I was even that high but when we were standing in the cop car's headlights I totally forgot how to use my arms