He said "I know I'm not gay. I fucked a guy once and didn't like it"
bring money and cleavage
how bad would it be if i made his twitter my home page?
I'm not gonna lie. having my legs shaved for me in the morning was a lovely surprise.
But life isn't just all about getting drunk & eating chicken strips.
We were messing around at his place it was going fine until he said, "I'm going to cum, hand me the shot glass"
It was so weird. She left to go to the bathroom and her older sister leaned towards me with a creepy smile and said, "You don't deserve her" and then continued to stare at me with a crazy expression for the rest of the evening.
That's kinky shit dude.
Someone I just met told me they were going to name their kid after me. Daylight savings is weird.
SKIIIIIIIIIIII, trip mo foes! Let-ith the epic- ness begin ith. Heroes go forth, nAy Sayers fuckin die. This is for the good of mankind! See you on the morrow
Apologies to the number who did not expect to get this but certainly be jealous of us.
Can we just talk about the fact that the last time I got laid I was wearing a Jurassic Park tshirt?
I was drunk and on Craigslist.. The drunk-text offers people got must have been either horrifying or glorious
don't bring your nerd jargon into this conversation about my naked body
No, I found out he was gay when I walked in on him blowing the guy from the dorm room next to ours.
Officially not baby mama #3. Celebration is in order.
we live vicariously through your huge boobs
Randomize
