OKAY SO WHENEVER I SEE AN UGLY COUPLE I ALWAYS WONDER WHAT THEY SAY TO EACH OTHER IN BED. creepy?
He ignores my calls like im some kind of stalker chick
Ive only called 5 times
gotta love it when a reminder comes up on your phone and u think u forgot about a meeting or something then u read it and its only to remind me to go to the titty bar at 3
Its like we are women, and boise state is a gangster rap song. This game is degrading
Blonde 1 is sitting on the floor crying and blonde 2 is asleep with her face in the toilet. This isn't what I had in mind when they asked me back
I chased a girl up a staircase screaming because she had a cardboard cut out of James Dean which, at the time, I believed to my friend being held against his will
We literally played a game called pass the child which consisted of us shitfaced tossing the 5 year old birthday boy at each other
When they say "all expenses paid" does that include bail?
Cute underage boy is in my house.
OH MY GOD. DON'T DO ANYTHING. WHY IS HE IN YOUR HOUSE.
Yes ma'am. At least you're a warning story I can tell to my kids in the future
I shaved my pussy for you. If you complain about a single hair that I missed again, you will be greeted by a bush the next time you go down on me and i will MAKE YOU KEEP GOING
On the flip side Weston asked if he could move me to Wisconsin to be his "moto hoe" which is actually a thing apparently
my roommate was being a bitch so I changed my Netflix password on her. 21st century slap in the face ladies and gentleman
Like I could say no to two hot people already naked and fucking. Please. I'm not made of stone.
Twice?!
would you eat cereal with weed in it
who is this???
Randomize
