My family just had an in depth argument about the meaning of chodes
This girl told me I had the balls of an infant..I replied by saying her vagina looks like Stargate.
Operation Purity has been aborted
I was eating her out when she coughed, I just swallowed a bright red blood clot
He's Hawaiian. Thank god it wasnt a real American
NASCAR RACE 2010 NO REGRETZZZ!!!
It is literally 8 in the morning.
I gotta bail on the cookout tonight. Im at the er getting stitches. Re-enacting porno went horribly wrong.
I just used cruise control in a 25 zone. When will this hangover end???
i want us to warm up up with us making out while i lay you down touching and feeling all the spots you know are going to get you warmed up. im gonna move down your body kissing every inch as i move down past your panty line ;)
Did you watch the carolina game tonight?
FridayRule: If it takes you longer than 5 minutes to find a parking spot, you don't have class today
We were on the ground in Tampa for 55 hours and we drank for 30 of them.
We won Spring Training 2013.
I vaguely remember making out with some dude. Please tell me he had all of his teeth.
Why were u walkin around mc with a toilet bowl lid handcuffed to u and carrying a stuffed Teddy bear last night?
just found the "let's take a picture before we do these roommates" before picture
thank god there was never an after picture.
Oral stamina is what keeps life exciting
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