escape the fate? dumbest band name ever. how about escape the fart. now that is a show i would go see!
I was too high to figure out which of the three doors would lead me to my classroom, so i sat down in the middle of the hallway and ate a twinkie.
I just found out my favorite drunk show, Repo Men, is just reenactments. I can't express through words my disappointment.
that's almost as bad as that time i almost ashed in a baby carriage
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Responsibility does not care about your dick.
maddie and i have invented a community puke bowl. explanation later
I have located the smell of the stripper and narrowed it down to 3 girls in class
Does peppermint hummus sound good or am I just high?
i just remember doing it on a pile of clothes while i heard the muffled sound of his friend laughing. then i realized we were in a closet.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We ended not having sex. I didn't want to explain that I was wearing a Unitard because all my socks and underwear were dirty.
I think we should take up crocheing or stamp collecting....something completely lacking penises
They shoved things up my nose I feel violated
He told me that before I went to bed I needed to do my stretches and then processed to demonstrate a squat thrust, while completely naked.
Am I the only one who saw the used condom in the driveway this morning
My mom has a bong in her bathroom, but no air freshener.
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