This girl looks like a mixture of kathy griffin and bill walton. i havent decided if that is a good thing.
You hooked up with 4 random girls, avoided your grilfriend finding out about it, and dodged traffic on Park Ave. Can you say luck of the Irish?
She just messaged me 19 sad faces.
haha the sad thing is i can't decide whats worse. the fact that you're drunk judging a science fair or the fact that i'm really proud of you for it.
You actually went to class. Im eating dry cereal naked and watching bring it on.
Biggest penis I've ever pity fucked
I feel like I just gave a blowjob to a freight train.
Topless bubble bath with a lesbian is debatable as a gay experience.
so you know how I brush my teeth after I give you a bj? according to my dentist my teeth have never been cleaner. looks like this will be a recurring thing
Figured out how I got so much alcohol in my hair: tried to drink my drink using my cleavage as a cup holder. Missed my drink hole and got it all in my hair
Just got back from the tanning beds. I'm a lobster. I fear for the safety of my nipples falling off.
I ended up in bed with a man from London in a sorority wing I am not apart of. Tequila fucks you up
At least is you came to Milwaukee to visit me you'd get the best mind blowing sex of your life and free wifi. Who doesn't want free wifi!
His whole street is under construction. Third walk of shame this week & I'm getting a lot of sympathetic nods from the workers.
Im part way to drunk.
Randomize
