dude...i just woke up in ****'s bed!
doesn't he have a girlfriend???
yeah...who do you think woke us up...
sorry probably not gonna make it :( kinda tied up right now
sad face, r u gay?... wait like really tied up?
:)
So in our children's lit class, some jackass little boy had gone thru the where's waldo book and circled waldo. I realize you would have been that kid.
You made me wash my hair in the kitchen sink while eating bay leaves
drunk. just smoked a spliff with a 19yr old hungarian bike taxi driver and bonded over the difficulties of getting weed in a different country. idk y shit like this isnt in the study abroad info packets
Is 'too horny to study' a good enough medical excuse to not take a final?
It's either my own vomit or popcorn butter in my ear right now. Banking on the second one.
We made popcorn last night. So it's both
She almost killed me. The shot she handed me had tacks in it. Wtf?!
As i was laying there shouting that he dislocated my hip he actually reached his armed around and patted himself on the back
I've been up for almost three hours and it took me until JUST NOW to figure out that what I'm tasting isn't blood, just the minerals in the water. Fuck hangovers, man.
I hat to flip my "days since last bad decision" chart back to zero. So...yeah. Sigh.
I feel badly that he has cancer, but this does not mean I am obligated to have sex with him. Again.
I had jack at 8 am= instant drunk
There are far too many naked dudes in your apartment, and they aren't even watching porn. I mean seriously, they've got the Lion King on.
I came home with 30lbs of BBQ last night. I can't pick up women in a bar but I sure can pick up leftovers from a corporate party.
Randomize
