I thought pig tail meant you were suppose to grab on to it when getting BJ
hows the party?
ists fjcssing insceredle
be there in 10
i'm not sure when it happened but apparently now it's topless bar night, im wearing a leotard and everyone is looking at me like i'm cheating.
He looked at me and said "Last call" before putting his penis away into his boxers
Is there a card that says "Sorry I got drunk at your Christmas party and tried to steal your monogrammed hand towels so that I could give you something nice for Christmas"?
my mom just cut me up lemons and limes so i would have some vitamins with my tequlia
I was topless in his bathroom sink taking bong rips , goodmorning . He told me he could get use to this
We had on the same team jersey so at the time it made sense to hook up.
Duh.
I cant be sure, but i think ive been drunk in this church before.
He has pizza coupons and a hammer next to his toilet.
These welts and bruises from letting gay boys whip my thighs last night are a clear indication i should lay off the tequila.
Yeah! I was just fired because there was an over hire and the new girl is hotter than me. Seeing as how the new girl is my baby sister I think punching my manager is excusable.
It's snowing in May and there was a law school party at the strip club. The end is near.
Only three months past my 21st and I'm done. So many life lessons in so little time.
The dominoes guy came back thirty mins later to ask me out. I guess he figures if I'm eating pizza alone I must have gotten dumped
Randomize