im ready to get crazy and take my wig off
And then she said we stopped for a train and i tried crawling out the back window.. again, i dont remember this.
two more shots til everyone in this club gets to see my cesarean scars.
Not just anyone can homewreck on three continents simultaneously
you are my hero
hows a nice way to say "yeah i would go to your dorm, but it's snowing and I know you're not going to blow me, so what's the point"?
We came back and there was a shotglass filled with what looks like blood. Come over soon, we're gonna try it out.
nothing worse than walking out of class after 3 hours and having covered exactly zero information
walking out with herpes. that would be worse
I just accidentally hit share on pornhub... Probably the scariest moment of my life
Seriously. All i can say is im covered in mud, my jaw hurts, i cannot straighten my arm, egg is everywhere, and there is a dead squirrel.
I'm sorry, you're actually right. Ostrich racing happens, and they're ridden like a horse. Bewildered and distraught.
Its perfect, I supply the pot she makes the brownies. I love the culinary dept.
I'm gonna send you a dick pic now just so your uncomfortable at work
I was really hoping my 420 would involve a lot more weed and a lot less buttholes
I'm starting to think that Cosmic Steve ripped me off
Concept: I never actually flirt with anyone, I'm just a bitch and some people find it endearing
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