But regardless, you really stood out last night, you should give me a chance
Sorry but you seem like a potential womanizer
handjob tips. give me some.
The police are arresting two women who got in a fight for the last Twilight DVD at Best Buy. Classic.
They upped the price of Plan B! Rite-aid is going to be the reason I have illegitimate kids.
Well I woke up with a note on me reading Dear Passed Out Girl, and ending with why I shouldn't drink so much. Damn Tequilla.
He soundtracked our prebreakup sex, our breakup, and out postbreakup sex. At least he's dedicated.
someone needs to make a hangover cure that isn't cocaine.
I saw him coke blaxckout on the subway at 9 this morning yelling at people callig himself the gatekeeper.
Let's get one thing straight; we aren't in a relationship. We fuck and occasionally go to subway.
Last night after the bar I went home and ate a pulled pork sandwich in a bubble bath
And then after we fucked he wouldn't stop calling me "champ". It was like I had sex with an extremely attractive soccer coach
apparently domino's not only has a live feed of pizzas coming out of the oven, but it also has a built in smooth jazz radio station. this pizza's getting really pornographic really fast.
Btw his name is Woody. I must be really drunk to think this is a good situation
30-degree weather + Metal Cockring Monday = really hard to pee.
He was like 120 lbs and 20 of that was penis
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