but it happened after you broke up with me and before we made up.
we just decided that lesbian tuesdays are a must, as of tomorrow.
oh well at that point I was already depressed with life because I had watched the bratz movie.
We learned about herpes today in bio. I might as well have given the lecture
I cleaned out the fridge, had to pound the brews. I am going to be wrecked for my final at 1
How do I know I'm high? Let me count the ways.
1. I put the milk in the cupboard, 2. Everything tastes fucking amazing, 3. My dog is really soft, 4. The lunesta butterfly flew out of my tv and touched me
Yeah, surprised you made it on time this morning. Remarkable, considering 2 hours ago you were pretending to be talking window curtains.
Except if I'm having sex. In which case you're in the bed with us or out of the room. No halfsie participation.
Overheard a drunk girl talk about how when she's drunk she believes in more than one God
It was like being run over by an orgasm freight train.
Just threw up in the trash can at my desk. I guess "beating the hangover" eventually leads to this.
I'm sorry I lead life with my vagina.
The dude we met that gave us weed sent me a video of his balls covering the sun like a solar eclipse
Just met my future wife. Please dont fuck her.
i’m blowing bubbles in my bloody mary so yeah it’s pretty much time to go
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