Is it weird that I have contacts who i've classified as DO NOT ANSWER?
Lol no its called college
Spencer Pratt, I WILL beat the shit out of you someday, I Promise
I think I'm going to die by hangover. I'm in my spanish class. So I guess I'm going to be muerte.
I have so much boob sweat I could bathe a baby
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I've never danced to a Michael Jackson song in a bar and left alone bro. Something in girls loves a guy who dances to mj
I'm not so good at organized events that don't revolve around whiskey or playgrounds.
I'm just going to lay in a blanket cocoon of self pity for the next few months.
I think people like me is why alcohol became illegal at one point
She had a tattoo on her pelvis that said "it's cock-o-clock" an had clocks and hot dogs exploding away from it. I'd like to tell you it was deal breaker buuuuuuut.......
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Why can't people give useful wedding gifts...like sex swings or Nutella?
There's a naked man in my car right now.
She can't brag about all the anal sex she has and then expect me not to awkwardly stare at her boyfriend when she brings him around
Apparently I'm a "fire hazard"
How do I say “I have great tits” without it sounding awful
It's fucking 2020, I should be able to watch Netflix in the buff while making brownies without you getting preachy about it.
Randomize