ur plase or mine? lol
well if you don't learn how to spell, you may be at your place and I'll be at mine.
My unemployment check should really just be direct-deposited into the checking account of my drug dealer
I had to stop messing around with him for fear of laughing in his face. I swear it was a pinky finger in his pants
couldnt find a condom. used a surgical glove instead. actually worked and the sex was great. thanks nursing school
Sunscreen. In my vag. I hate summer sex.
I met her tumbling down the stairs chugging Captain Morgan. I'm not sure why she has the better reputation either.
I performed "get broken glass out of my shoulder" surgery last night... Drunk, with a what-a-burger straw.
She's the drunk girl with the air-horn and sunflower seeds.
We just took back to back grav bong hits and are playing battleship. She guessed Z - 12 so weve switched board games.
i just found my fake in the snow. LIFE IS AWESOME
I can't sleep. My mind keeps asking "turn down for what?" but it won't accept any of my answers.
I put a zucchini in my pussy for you
Tempting guys with beer and cheese. How Midwestern are we?
PLEASE LET MY BIRD FUCK YOUR BIRD
You had a 45min conversation with the Ronald McDonald statue I have the video to prove it
Randomize
